obsessed? addicted? infatuated?

   I've been finding myself falling more in love with Jesus.
   There's a verse that says, "Taste and see that the Lord is good." You know that verse? Well, I keep tasting. And I keep seeing that He is good. So I keep tasting. And I keep seeing more of how good He is. So I keep tasting..
   You know that other verse? The one that says, "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Well, I thought it'd be really cool to get the desires of my heart, so I determined to delight myself in the Lord. And the more I delight in Him, the more He becomes the desire of my heart. And the more I desire Him, the more I delight in Him..
   It's crazy. Every time I get to know Him better, or spend time with Him, or serve Him, or read His Word, or worship, the more I want to do those things. It's like an addiction than a hunger, because it's never satisfied. I just want more, more, more of God. He's just so good! I cannot get over Him.
   I've been finding myself reading the Bible more than any other book. I've been finding myself praying in tongues at the most ridiculous times. I've been finding myself watching preaching and teaching videos. I've been finding myself overwhelmed by His goodness and greatness every time I look at the sky. I've been finding myself leaving other conversations to go talk to God. I've been finding myself constantly worshiping.
   I've been finding myself falling more in love.

Yes. I googled pictures of the sky. You're welcome.

faith means

   Faith does not mean I know what's gonna happen. It just means I know the One who does know. It means I know that He is good, that He has a plan for me, and that His plan is better than anything I could ever come up with.

   Faith doesn't mean there won't be struggles. It means that when struggles come, the joy of the Lord will be my strength. It means He will never put more on me than I can bear, and that He will work all things together for my good.

   Honestly, this situation sucks. It's hard. I don't know what to do, and I don't know what's gonna happen, and I hate not knowing things. But I have faith in the One who knows all things. I know that in my weakness God is strong. I know that His perfect love casts out all fear, and that He will glorified in this.

   Faith doesn't mean it's not hard. It just means I don't have to be afraid.

Jeremiah 29:11

Nehemiah 8:10

1 Corinthians 10:13

Romans 8:28

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

1 John 4:18

things we wish were true

   Sometimes we say things over and over again until we believe them. Things we wish were true, things we're trying to make true. It's as if repetition of a statement proves its factuality.
   Sometimes we say things over and over again to other people until they believe them. And heck, if everyone else believes, why shouldn't we?
   Sometimes we say things over and over again, out loud and in our heads, trying desperately to persuade ourselves of their truth. Sometimes we want so badly to convince ourselves that we convince ourselves that we have convinced ourselves. Sometimes we buy it. Sometimes we take our wishful thinking and make it our reality.
   But sometimes there's a little piece of our hearts, way deep down, that's not so sure.